Saturday, September 17, 2011

Someone's Judging You? So What's Wrong With That?

Those of you who constantly judge - prepare yourselves for my rant!

O.K.  someone is judging you - maybe on Facebook, maybe from within your family or friends.  It could even be that you feel an outsider is judging you.  And inevitably their verdict is guilty.  I honestly don't know how people who are accused of a crime and  tried by a Jury ever manage to get acquitted!   In our ordinary daily lives we mostly seem to be questioned  and critised about our choices, our lifestyle and worst of all - on our style of parenting.  The latter is the hardest one to accept, and it is one of the most hurtful things anyone can do - judge you as a parent, and then pronounce their verdict.   It always seems to be "guilty",  why is this?

You have NO RIGHT to judge others, no right at all.  Until your own windows are clean then don't damned well point your fingers at anyone else.   I say -  what in the hell gives YOU the right to interfere in MY life, and to try to force me to comply with your ways or your thoughts?   Are you so damned arrogant that you believe there is only one way to do something, and that is YOUR way?   Your way or the highway huh?   If my parenting method is different from yours, why does that make it WRONG?   Why does that make me a "bad" mother, and how does that show that my parenting skills are poor?  Who ARE you anyway?    OH?  You are a mother as well?  In that case, you should take a damned long hard look at yourself and your hurtful, destructive comments about other people.   Hang your head in shame for what you have said, because you have just destroyed the confidence of another mum.   Well done - you are such a shining example. 

Just because person A doesn't agree with person B spending on a fancy pram, for example, it does NOT give person A the right to criticise!   OH?  You think it does?  Why?   Put the shoes on your own feet and think how you would feel if you were on the receiving end.   Not good huh?  You would feel crap to put it nicely.   And now what have you done?  You have taken all the excitement away from the long-awaited arrival of that special pram for that special baby.   Nice work.   Whelan the Wrecker could take lessons sometimes.   You disgust me.

If I don't feed my baby the same food as you do - is that a reason for you to get on your high horse and start laying down the law to me about what is best for MY baby?   Did you know my baby had digestive problems?  No?  Well HOW DARE YOU  even comment?   My child is slower at speaking that yours?  Oh dear, I really need to have her checked because there is something wrong, isn't there, and you can't understand why I haven't done anything before this?   EXCUSE ME?  Do you know how many times I have consulted with doctors and health visitors and child behaviourists?  No?   Strange, I could have sworn you knew everything there was to know about me and my child.   MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

Well I can't bring myself to cut my little one's hair, it is just beautiful, and is so curly and such a stunning colour.  What in HELL gives you the right to compare my baby's hair to that of an old lion? YOU BITCH.  What would you do if I said that to you?  Oh I know, floods of tears and a huge outpouring of rage.   I am waiting for this one to rebound on you, your remark was cruel, thoughtless, hurtful and ignorant beyond belief.   Were you never told "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all"?      Or are you just so hidebound you think people will find your remarks amusing.    Here is the news - they don't

If my way of raising my child is different from yours that makes it different, not wrong.  If my weight is more than yours, we are just different.  I am not wrong.  If I have an untidy house that is my business, it is not wrong. I could go on citing examples for hours, but surely you get the picture?  I AM NOT YOU.    If you and your like had their way we would all be living in a world of Stepford Wives and Stepford Children. 

You want to offer me advice?  Well, thank you!  I will listen, and will choose whether to take that advice or not.  But when you try and impose your will on me - be warned - you will be biting off more than you can chew.  Just keep in mind the biblical quote "judge not, lest ye be judged"  -  and you will be, oh you will be.


lisa :) said...

What an absolutely brilliant piece, i wholeheartedly agree with everything written !! xx

Nels Angels said...

Oh Very Well said indeed. I truly love this blog Carol. Can I pinch it for my court session??

Carol said...

Thank you for your time and your kind comments! Yes Nel, pinch what you like! xxx